December 3-1-1

3 updates, 1 useful tool, 1 impactful image

Update One: Looking at my “why” keeps me going with the novel.

I’m officially a couple months back to work after an unofficial maternity leave and damn does it feel good to be back. It’s a strange thing to love working so much that I want to cut my breaks and vacations short so I can get back to writing. Not that writing is always pleasant or even fun. It’s just very fulfilling and I crave that satisfied feeling of having gotten a scene down, or even just a diary entry.

I find a lot of peace in the workday routine I’ve established for myself, with mornings dedicated to writing and afternoons trying to fit in craft lessons and reading and self-improvement in the gaps between child rearing and cleaning and planning kid activities.

I’m finding my groove again with novel-writing after a lengthy bout of self-doubt and fear that made it so hard to open up my scrivener file and start typing.

Here’s what finally got me past that wall: I kept asking questions about why it was so hard for me to sit down and write and I kept trying different solutions until things started clicking again. For example, the typical ADHD difficulty of starting tasks was addressed by joining morning zoom writing dates with fellow WFWA writers and writers from “Ink Tank” my critique group.

Also, I realized I was paralyzed by the fear of writing past the recommended 100K word count for a debut novel. I fell into despair when confronted with realities like: my book needs more scenes to serve the plot, or my existing scenes need more interiority, or more description, or generally just more. So I just gave myself permission to write as much as I wanted and think about editing it down later.

I felt a lot of cynicism about the likelihood that my novel would ever get published so I spent a lot of time thinking about why I was writing the novel in the first place, what was so compelling about the story to me, and how it felt to just write it, regardless of its future success. And I started getting some perspective on what types of creative projects are possible to finish and put out into the world by looking at examples of other creative people who did just that. Which brings me to my next update.

Update Two: I’m starting a new feature article series called “make it anyway” about creatives who finish and disseminate niche creative projects despite the odds.

There are lots of other (bigger) publications that interview creatives about their process. But that content doesn’t really scratch the itch for me because those interviews feature artists at the pinnacle of commercial success (e.g., bestsellers, box office hits, sold out concert arenas). Their paths can feel inevitable in hindsight, even when they weren’t.

I’m less inspired by those examples because I’m not sure my novel will be a commercial success and I wanted to find a way to believe in my project despite that. I needed examples of dedicated creatives painstakingly making their art because of creativity’s other inherent rewards, not just money or popularity.

I wanted to interview artists who make art that isn’t designed to please some algorithm—work driven by genuine creative vision rather than virality.

To me, that must mean the artist is so committed to the art itself that they’d sacrifice the things that capitalism values in order to pursue their work with integrity. Not that I’m against commercial success for artists (we all have to eat!) I just need the quieter examples of art being made to feel like I can put pen to paper myself.

For my first article (to be published next week) I interviewed Tyler Dunne, the author of The Blood and Guts: How Tight Ends Save Football. Tyler’s story about how he wrote this book—the sacrifices, the time, the persistence—inspired me to keep going on my novel, and hopefully it will help you too.

Update Three: I’ve leveled up.

I’ve been sharing part two of my current novel drift with Ink Tank (my writing critique group). Part two features a new protagonist and scenes from his point of view. One of my critique partners commented that she really liked my new protagonist, that he had a lot of depth and complexity, and she was enjoying his story arc and inner world.

After hearing that, I realized it wasn’t necessarily that my second protagonist was any more interesting, or his story was any more compelling, than the other MC—it’s just that I’ve become a better writer so part two feels like a totally different book. I’m better at interiority, relationship dynamics, dialogue, and prose.

In the New Year, I’ll write a summary of what has been challenging for me as a first-time novelist with no formal creative writing training (no MFA etc.) and what resources I’ve used so far to shore up the gaps in my knowledge and skills. Looking forward to getting even better next year.

Using gCal to make in “Ideal” Calendar

Being self-employed and not having a boss to hold me accountable to deadlines or make progress on projects can wreak havoc on people with ADHD like me. I have had to look for ways to give my day structure and a rhythm. Occasionally my projects and ideas get so numerous, I am paralyzed with indecision—what am I supposed be doing right now?! What should I focus on? That is when my “ideal” calendar comes to the rescue.

Earlier this year, I did a deep brainstorm on what projects and roles were most important for me to work on in 2025 and how much time I wanted to dedicate to each project or responsibility. With those values firmly in hand, I blocked out time on my “ideal” calendar, dedicating the hours I wanted to spend and when to do it.

Google Calendar allows you to stack calendars (work, personal, shared) on one screen. In addition to your “main” account calendar, you can create custom sub calendars. I created a sub calendar dubbed “Ideal Calendar 2025” where I laid out what I’d like to be doing during the week in ideal conditions.

I block out when to write, do admin, join weekly critique group meetings, do yoga, and weightlifting. (Even when to shower!) All these calendar events are recurring, so they are the same time week after week. It gives my day and week a rhythm and predictability that is soothing to my nervous system.

I even made my calendar a dashboard of sorts. Event descriptions include the zoom link to weekly meetings, or to my yoga class booking page to make it easier to execute on a given scheduled task.

The ability to uncheck my “ideal” calendar from the calendar home screen is useful because it opens up all the white space, making it easier to see all the non-negotiable items that I absolutely can’t miss, like doctor’s appointments.

I love finding creative ways to use tools that are available for free/freemium. Hope this helps you with your project goals!

This is baby Idris. He is miraculous. But also: I am very glad we beat that school up North last Saturday. Go Bucks!